untitled
viviti

Sesame Street




 

it's more of the same

the pink and black girl was looking

-when you said hello-

she knew, lying there

maroon fingernails

black hair swirling around her face

so patient still tense waiting



 

a panther to spring out of the sea



 

walking down the street

your shadow scared you

the wuffs of the dogs scared you

the palm that clutched the movie was sweating.



 

a gleaming screen obliterates your touch with

scenarios

and now you, the spectator

Hollywood cliché

you and me shall

tell you

what you are



 

you waded into the water

shrieked when the seaweed came and touched your feet

softly ever so softly



 

the same old music plays

fast food at a food court

some said you didn't care

but some said you cared too hard



 

wanting to lash out at the man who asks whether

you have a television in your living room

....

(and He sits nearby... regards you.... laughs

softly ever so softly

and you want to caress those lips

to entrance him.)

....

but your sense of decency, of growing up in an Indian society

holds you back.



 

the restaurant's carousel is already spinning.



 

look at her pink rimmed black mascaraed eyes

softly ever so softly

Has Mona Lisa been reincarnated?



 

already your mood is destroyed

will it regenerate

will it be another computer program

that spins out of course

neglected; you don't want to learn it.



 

your response:

"you've got it all wrong"

"I'm not like that"

"can't you see me the way I truly am"

"can't you see me"



 

softly ever so softly

the horses and unicorns of the

lone carousel go around

and around

and around



 

there you are! ah, you can never elude me.

so I am walking closer

running before it starts up again

but...

the pink and black girl is calling me....



 

everyone says

(those things never happen.)

"but they happen all the time!"

yes

it happens all the time

you see my dear

that is the whole point...



 

vehemence.

unfilled glass of passion.

failed subtlety.



 

softly ever so softly...



 

you didn't tell your father the truth.

you told him all the outlines

a Nobel Prize in planning

and when you cried

you remembered a chocolate cake.



 

guilt: the ice slowly running down off the ice cream

with the sugar and cream and fruit and candy and whatever

your fingers are sticky... loving it aren't you....



 

"sometimes I want to break everything

(those unseen things

I want to crash through glass)

am I innately violent?"



 

no, no, no, you are not.

of course not, ma cherie.

It's life. you are a poet. all poets have the blues.



 

shrieks inwardly

you act out ... eh, your clichéd dreams maybe.

softly ever so softly...



 

already?

did they cross the border

between India and Pakistan

already?

were the barriers flung in triumph

and did you stand on the flags?

the Indian Pakistani soil.

(did it taste like anything special?)



 

oh, those lost words

(the ones you never wrote down, I mean)

you turn away, and she is there

and the pink and black girl has turned her face away

and I love you, and I love you, and I love you

don't you see

....after all everything is about love

"all I want is to dance with you

kiss you"

sweet purple pink black

all colours are merged together



 

turned away.

who was left?



 

grace: an anticipation of possibility.

 


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